Thank you!

I hate receiving gifts, i know that is a wierd statement but it is true. It is so hard for me to feel adequate enough to accept a gift and I truly sit where I am and just think “Why, why me, what makes me so special?” Let me give you an example. A couple years ago now my wife and I were being buried underneath my former/ current stupidity when it came to finances. We were given tools to budget and be God honoring (financially) when we went through our marathon, also known as pre-marital counseling. I being the [oh so] Godly man that I am promptly forgot what we learned and tried to apply those habits that had placed myself thousands of dollars in debt. After much struggle we decided to go to the first offereing of F.P.U. at Westside and it ablsolutely changed our lives. Throughout the next year we became disciplined and focused (click here to get a video of what that means) and a little silly (mostly on my part), but completely serious about honoring the Spirit that was prompting us to follow Him in the first place. One day while at the Cheesecake Factory (where I used to work) Heather (my wife) called me and informed me that she was coming in. When she reached the front desk one of the ladies up there came and excused me from a class that I was training, as I walked towards the front I could see from a distance that my wife was visibly shaken. When she locked eyes with me she silently walked towards me and when she was within striking distance extended her left hand that held a large manilla envelope (I was thinking oh crap what have I done now). I opened the package to discover at least a $500+ of movie tickets, coupons, gift cards, and just plain money, including some basic instructions. I looked at my baby-girl and ask her why and at that very moment (like it was queued up or something) she began to weep and say I don’t know. I sit here tonight typing with goose-bumps thinking of how that simple package literally saved us so many times throughout that next year, that year was so difficult (arguably one of the most difficult of our marriage to date), yet still to this day I latently ask “Why? What makes us so special? How did they know?” and to tell the truth I still can’t answer any of those questions. I still wonder why Christ saved someone like me, I still sit and question whether I am good enough, I still remember the look of the one I love weeping tears of joy for an undeserved (but much needed) gift. I still hate gifts, but now I am starting to appreciate there importance in our lives and the lives of others, so I sit here tonight writing some “Thank You” notes just to let those who I know have blessed me know what it means to me. You know who you are and if I haven’t said it by this point, Thank you from the bottom of my heart.

**Tonight I was listening to Derek Webb’s album “The House Show”**

~ by Jon Nelson on April 18, 2008.